Tuesday, December 19, 2006

when the cold lays siege


Raymond Han, "Studio Still Life #4" (2006)


standing by the car at 3am you left a note of war
in the snow that had fallen for two days straight
the cold laying siege and putting us all in the mood
for blood-letting

you stated a refusal: you would no longer feel
i corrected it
…no longer feel anything other than anger
which made you hate all the more, but being right was my only defense

and what were these wars we fought as the cold laid siege:
over hands that touched me
lies that had been told me
violences that played themselves out on my flesh

wars that had all been fought over my body before
and so were nothing new
i knew the dance of this conflict, had laid down my armor many times in surrender
its rhythm was not unique, its cuts were always mortal

there is no defense for this when the cold lays siege
you shed my blood because it is the only way you can feel
i shed my blood because it keeps me from feeling
and i know that there is no winning this war

-LoA

9 comments:

Anonymous said...

This is awesome!!!

"you shed my blood because it is the only way you can feel

i shed my blood because it keeps me from feeling"

So powerful.

Anonymous said...

Wow. This is deep. I am loving your site.

Lawrence of Arabia said...

thank you both. i am flattered. i hope you continue to find something interesting in your visits here.

best wishes,
LoA.

Dr. Russell Norman Murray said...

You have a very artistic site.

Russ:)

Baraka said...

The artwork, poetry and insights on your blog are just knocking me out.

Well done!

Lawrence of Arabia said...

russ, i hope that dissertation is going well. thanks for stopping by.

baraka...coming from you, that is very high praise. thank you very much.

Aisha said...

wow. this poem is breathtaking. Did you write this?

"but being right was my only defense" That touched me in particular.

Um Ibrahim said...

"wars that had all been fought over my body before
and so were nothing new"
My favorite part:)

Lawrence of Arabia said...

thank you both

and yes, all texts are mine unless otherise noted. i do occasionally put up quotes from others, but mostly i just force my own stuff upon the hapless and unwary. ;)

best wishes,
LoA.